Since Monday, I have been noticing the energetic build up to Saturday’s Lunar Eclipse. Every time I have left the sanctuary of my home, the world around seems to be teeming with chaotic vibes. Sirens, noise, agitation, strange encounters, and an overall energy of tension. It is a fire, but it’s not necessarily an angry fire. Nor is it carefree. I can feel it in my own physical body -- the grip of the mind attempting to hang on and having to coax it with special attention to rest, relax, and open. It is not that there are a lot of thoughts, but rather a sudden awareness of the iron-like vice of various egoic and emotional states, many of which I am not even consciously aware of. Some of which might not even be mine personally. When a wildfire caught on a mountain just a few miles away from my house, blowing and burning away over 500 acres of mountainside forest, the word that immediately came to mind was “Purification.” Tuesday night, as the town was crawling with unusual activity, I stopped to observe the burning mountain.
Firefighters from all over were at the scene attempting to contain a fire in windy conditions and extremely rugged terrain where vehicles could not travel. Again and again, since I have lived in Western North Carolina nature has shown me its abiding and unending power. The idea that mankind has at any time in history felt he has “control” seems increasingly laughable. For here in this environment, there is absolutely no manmade thing that can survive the rainfall, plant overgrowth, flooding, landslides, etc, without constant upkeep, and now – even a fire can start out of nowhere and creep steadily towards civilization with raging indifference.
It is the perfect metaphor for all that we have been experiencing.
Since the Winter Solstice, we have been undergoing an intense, oceanic process of reflection and purging. The New Moon Solar Eclipse two weeks ago was the climatic point of this long process of inner observation and feeling. Many people have found themselves in a state of grieving over things long since past, believed to be healed, or even, inexplicably, for no nameable reason. There is a feeling ‘Like life itself is dying’ to quote my own journals -- A deep sadness that is accompanied by a sense of ending, even if the departure is a welcome one. This underlying feeling does not seem to negate any good feelings we might have about the future, but the present situation is one of powerful unburdening, release, and letting go – and all of the sadness, apprehension, and fear that goes with it!
As we have traveled into this week of the Lunar Eclipse I have begun to really feel the ‘fire.’ That is, the Aries fire. It feels much like the fire on the mountain here outside of Asheville. Aries is the first sign of the zodiac and represents initiating energy as well as innocence, purity, and freedom. The vibe of this time has had a strong element of initiation, but it is intrinsically paired with what feels to me like an alchemical firing process. This is the doorway of space and time that we have been awaiting for some years. By fall, once the Saturn retrograde cycle is complete and we enter another eclipse season, we will have fully crossed the burning lake into the next dimension of our collective human life experience.
Remember, we are still in the energy of the Pisces New Moon eclipse that is primarily about relinquishing the past. All unfolding energies subsequent still harken back to this essential concept. These are eclipses of karmic release – very profound, soul level, collective, world shaking, yet deeply personal transition. It does not stop after this month – as the influence of eclipses is with us for six months – so see this as a tipping point with reference to recent inner processes. What has happened this week, as the Aries energy has been accentuated by the Sun’s travels through the strong currents here, is the feeling that the emotions have surfaced and now we must burn them away.
This is BIG energy. About as big as it gets. But yet, we are not meant to try and manage or control it, per se. Simply we are to be its witness… and allow our lives to change in accordance rather than resistance. Our work now is not a directive, must do, must act, type of work – it is rather something more subtle: to look within, to allow what arises to arise, and then to open the door for its leaving. It is as if, perhaps, we are walking on coals – there is not pain in an overwhelming sense, rather a heat that continually churns, and our body sweats and purges. Stuck feelings deep within us purge through our skin, and the heat of the fire evaporates them. We are creating an empty space. This is a release of conditioning: societal, familial, and personal that over the years have blocked or hindered our connection to spirit. The idea now seems to be that the life of disconnection is no longer amenable.
We will be shown the way to clarity. We will be given the “why” for all of the recent years’ turmoil. But first we need to find “true north.” The true center of our being. The truth of us beneath all of the emotional layers that we have worn for years upon years – even beyond this life. This is the release of the “small self” or the “ego self.”
The process of emptying past experiences can be difficult because so often we identify with the past as being “who we are.” But it is not the truth. The past does not define us, good or bad. Or, at least, we do not have to let it define us.
Often our “identities” are like relationships that obstruct true flow in our lives. For life is change – one second we are this, another we are that. The only way to be all of it is to be none of it. Wonderful magic exists everywhere, every day, and is freely at our disposal. Who we are on the outside is not important, it is our resiliency and willingness to adapt that enriches us. Sometimes we have to suspend our notions of who we are to welcome growth and new opportunities. Think about it – does joy really come to us when we’re attaching to our roles? Or does it come when we open our hearts to the possibilities we have not previously imagined?
Aries energy is like a child. Fresh, pure, and innocent. It doesn’t even know who it is yet! So what I am saying is -- emptying is opening. The more structures we remove around our identity, the more peace we feel in our hearts. The more we explore what is ego and what is truth, the more we discover our universal nature. We can remove our identity and still be ourselves. We can release history, and still be forthright in the now. We can yield to powerful currents, and still maintain our grace.
Walk through the fire. Burn away your fear. Burn away your grief. Burn away your history. Burn away your very self.
For beneath the ash is a tiny sprout. A new tree. A renewed state of being. A fresh start.
It is not for us to dictate. No, rather, it is for us to face, with courage, a process of transformation that can shape the world, if we let it.